yesterday was my lolo’s 40 days of death celebration. i woke up feeling that the day was going to be a same old, same old day. but i was wrong;it was only yesterday that i’ve realized he’s gone, physically gone. In the beginning, accepting the death of my lolo was hard. i ran, walked, and played thinking that he’s still alive and ready to soothe me whenever i feel glum. well this figment of imagination ended yesterday when i saw my gramp’s portrait. the portrait which made me realize the one thing i’ve dreaded…REALITY.

I fought hard to overlook reality but i’ve lost the fight. reality is everywhere, reality is now, i should face the sad truth that gramp’s gone. the tears that had long been kept in my soul finally found their way and flowed. it took me a while to pacify and regain my composure and when i got hold of myself again, a light feeling swallowed my heart, the feeling of acceptance. i guess the bucket of tears set me free towards acceptance, accepting that my lolo will forever be physically absent and accepting that i must go on with my life even without him smiling at me. I found out that acceptance’s not really hard because gramp’s not completely gone; he’s just physically gone and that’s for sure. i may not see him but i can feel him lingering in my heart.

Much love,